I have many talents and skills, but listening is not one of them. Because I have my second job interview on Monday (today) with a company I really like, I have to figure out what this “tone-deaf, not listening” story is all about. When I’m nervous the “Am putting my fingers in my ears, can’t hear you, lalala” mode seems to increase. It’s not that I don’t want to, honestly...I really, really want to. But it’s mostly that every word I hear, seems to trigger a bunch of associations that run away and go mess with my head. So after a few sentences my brain feels and sounds like an orchestra playing Bach, Mozart and Death Metal all at the same time. So no wonder I can’t concentrate enough to stand still and really listen.
And let’s not forget that when I’m nervous I seem to be in love with the sound of my own voice. All the while my inner voice tries to shout over the racket of that famous orchestra and tries hard to get hold of that Woody Woodpeckers beak and squeeze it tight. But when started that motor mouth just won’t shut it. So to be able to listen, I somehow have to quiet down those enthusiastic musicians and disable my face muscles (Botox?!). It seems like a “Mission Impossible”, but I have found a cure. I’m not one of those Hippie “be in touch with yourself and planet” kind of woman. But I have found that when I meditate at least 30 minutes at the end of the day and start the day with 10 sun salutations...the world seems to quiet down, my head comes awake with the bright lightness of being. And somehow...every word I hear makes sense. I feel like, to quote John Lennon...”All you need is love.”
Well I had my job interview today...I did meditate...a lot...and it went very well. So maybe next week I have another job...I don’t know, fingers crossed...and pstttttttt I DID end up listening...:)
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