On the beach..

Went to the beach today with a couple of friends from Swiss. It felt so good to be outside...the light was just beautiful...soft air brushing against my skin. Didn't let my hair down (had my camera with me...so didn't want to see hair flopping in front of my lens). Enjoyed being in the open air. I promiss myself that I will do that more often.

The babyblue accents on the waves were really amazing, because the sky was just very grey but above the horizon the sky was baby blue and somehow, sometimes...this refected on the waves. Really special and strange...a hint of color in a grey world...like hope peeking round the corner.
We found some roses on the beach...and sticked them in the sand...such a beautiful and strange sight...


Love dogs on the beach... he really looked like he was having the time of his life... Run, run, run, ball, ball, ball, splash, catch....run, run, run.....Jippieeeeeee (Would love to be a dog on the beach some time...)


Oh and I raced through a red light...because it was like a Madurodam kind of size....er...very small...in the middle of the road...for no good reason I could see. I thought it might be a warning sign or something. But when I saw all the other people stop...oeps oeps oeps... Did I mention I rode up the wrong side of a parking lot this week. I think the local alarms should go off when I step into my little car. Thanx angels on my shoulder...good work this week...:) Phew!

A Chiwawa called Bobelientje

I had the strangest dream a couple of nights ago. I dreamt I had a dog. A dog called Bob or preferably Bobelientje...and he was a Chiwawa. A naughty little thing, mind you...but...er...a Chiwawa none the less. I woke up wondering what this could possibly mean. The only thing I could come up with was that I kind of like a man named Bob, he lives just around the corner of my street, wears wooden shoes, loves old moterbikes and I suspect him to be an Archeologist. But such a big man can hardly fit in a Chiwawa. I have to come up with a better theory then this one I suppose.

No next of Kin

I seem to live in a world that I don't recall. Fathers who don't act as fathers and only think of themselves. A person formally known as brother no. 2, tells me on the phone that I'm not direct next of kin and so am not invited to his private birthday party which only includes brothers and sisters. And hell if I'm not one of them. This came to me like a total shock...WHAT?!
I mean give me a break, I haven't felt up and running for a few months, with me doing 2 jobs at the same time, having to have my poor cat put to sleep, feeling detached from longtime friends, feeling bummer most of the time. But hé....there's always family...NOT. Not until your mother is dead like 13 years and you are considered a once upon a time stepsister who doesn't live just round the block. Oh fuck off.

I can understand that he wants to have a small party since his wife is pregnant and ready to burst and sick at the same time. But why does my other sister in law thinks it's only obvious that I should be there? Why does she expect me to be here, today on your sofa? Because she thinks I part of the family. How dare you be so cruel as to call me no next of kin in my face. That's why I'm so furious, who cares about an intimate dinner for....people. Those words you can't take back. And it makes it clear where you stand. Here is where I stand...piss off! You are no brother of mine. And dad if you're listening...you can bugger off too.