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Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Boring

I've been quite boring lately on my writing. It has a very simple explanation.
Too many people who I don't want to allow a peep in my brain and heart have access to my blog.
So strange that I don't mind shouting my dreams, hopes and despairs on the net, around the globe and back, but I do have a problem with some people reading it. The ones who's faces are familiar. The ones I can bump into on the street or in the supermarket... Faces I am not happy to see, who are part of my hurt, my loneliness. But it stops here, because I don't write this blog for them, I write this blog for me. Writing like this is like shouting my joy, my fears over rooftops into the world. Not knowing who hears me, but knowing I am heard, I am here, I am alive. It is too strong a freedom to give up. Maybe a little courage still trickles through these vains...

Courage

Courage...I seem to have a lack of it most of the time. All mouth and no heart, so scared, while time rushes me by.

A beautiful poem by Alice M. Swaim pulled heartstrings when I heard it, made me shiver when I read it and makes my sleepy chickenheart roar and beat on the rhythm of my dreams...maybe I can try again...soon.

"Courage is not the towering oak 
that sees storms come and go;
it is the fragile blossom 
that opens in the snow."

Friday, April 17, 2009

La La Land

Had a real drunken, cry my eyes out, confession big time baby mood yesterday.
It was kind of uplifting, it set me free and it made a mess off things...or rather I did.
There is a reason why I don't drink much, let alone get drunk...oh yeah, I get emotional..blehhhhh...:)
But in spite of all above...had a great time mister A. and miss J...:)

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

In my dreams...I'm floating...

In my dreams...I'm floating

Yesterday was the last day of my digital photo course.
Had fun...and finally at the very end of the line...
I got/made where I came for in the first place...
Something soft, new, dreamlike and a bit dark.

Waves crashing in...