Memory Rebirth

My memory has never been my strongest asset. And I never really minded, till I lost my mother and with each passing day my memories of her began to fade as well. It is like losing her all over again and somehow that hurts even more then the first time. I have decided long ago, that to reclaim those lost memories and gather new, I will ask everybody who has held her in their hearts to share a few memories with me. It’s time to start that journey, I’m a bit frightened to take the first step. I don’t know where this path will lead me. But it’s time and I’m on my way.

Here are some questions I would like to ask the people I will be interviewing...

• How did you meet my mother?
• Has she made a difference in your life?
• What is your fondest or most special moment with her? It can be sad, funny or deeply felt.
• What did you like about her the most?
• What was she like as a person? (kid, woman, wife, friend and mother)
• What has she meant to you in life and what has her death meant to you personally?
• How was she before and after she had me? Did she change? Can you tell me something about the period she was pregnant with me?
• How did she cope with the death of my big brother?
• What can you tell me about her marriage with my father and the period after their divorce?
• If there is one decision you think she should have done differently, what would that be?
• Can you tell me an anecdote of my mother I don’t know? About her childhood, her relationship with her family, boyfriends, school, work, holiday, life philosophy, me etc.
• What was her opinion of herself and how did you see her?
• How did you experience the last days of my mother and what is your last memory of her?
• What do you miss about her most?
• If you could talk to her now, what would you like to say to her?

With these questions I hope to recover and create memories of my mother, the way she stood in life and love and how she was as a child. I also hope to fill in some large blindspots that we never got round to. I hope to breath life into the memory of this beautiful and loving woman, who was special to so many people. But mostly I hope to feel her stepping beside me on my road in life once again...and this time to stay.